This week's assignment is to understand better what it means to be controlling toward the world. In essence, we are gaining a better understanding of our personal boundary through this exercise.
In this week's newsletter Question and Answer, sometimes vague words that describe a certain fear or cause of anxiety or a "hot-button" issue that makes us angry are really code words for holes in our personal boundary.
In this case the word is "insecurities." Our friend who asked the question identified her dilemma as feeling insecure about her partner. Really, this revealed a hole in her personal boundary in which she would have wanted to control her partner who lives many miles away.
Your assignment is to pay attention to the language you use to identify your feelings. Pay attention to the hot-button issues (or people!) that tend to make you very angry without warning. In most cases, those are indicative of boundary holes.
What are those specific words, topics, issues, people? Write down their names. Now, say "no" toward letting them stir up unwanted emotions. Say, "I do not want this (anger, anxiety, fear, worry) that comes up when I think about __________."
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